what really matters...

So I just recently ran into a blog floating around you may have already read, “Men prefer debt free virgins without tattoos” this blog really made me so sad. Sad for the writer, sad for the readers. 

First off, I want to say sorry. I’m sorry to any woman who this offended or made feel less than. I’m sorry for the close mindedness that is behind this logic. If you don’t fit that perfectly it certainly does not mean that you are out of the equation or that you’ve screwed it all up, it means that you are human just like the rest of us. There was a time in my life I could have read that blog and been a huge mess. Lost all hope. Luckily, I have learned too much about grace and who God truly is that I know better now.  

I was a debt free virgin without tattoos… the “preferred” one. I lived at home with my family. I decided against school because my career of choice didn’t require it and I knew my hearts desire was to be a stay at home mama one day. I had “it all” did it all "right" before marriage and then crap hit the fan. 

These labels are by far what would set me up for a great relationship/life, however let me tell you what has...

having God as my foundation. 

I do believe we should strive to live a life that God has asked us to and from that we will live the best life we can. Obeying His commandments will help us to have the healthiest relationships and benefit the most from life. But I also know that He doesn’t expect perfection. 

I currently don’t fit the mold. Not because of choice but because of life. Real life. Real circumstances. Real hardship.

Well, okay the tattoo, that was my choice sorry not sorry! 😜

You want to know what’s truly attractive to men?   

A true, genuine, loving, kind heart. 

You know what people crave in relationships? 

A caring, authentic, honest heart.

You know what God looks at?

You guessed it! He looks at the heart. 

1 Samuel 16:7 “For the Lord sees not as man sees; man looks at outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart.”

Girls, there’s so much more to it all. These labels don’t even scratch the surface to the depth of you.

You never know what people have gone through or why their life looks the way that it does. Each person has a story, a reason behind who they are. It’s not our place to judge, it is definitely not our place to put labels on people!

God isn’t looking for some cookie cutter human to love or to use to change the world. He’s looking for real people who are willing to be open and honest and vulnerable. People who will love like he loves. True, authentic people who might not have it all together. That’s what he loves. That’s what is beautiful to Him. And that is exactly what each human is looking for in this world. Someone to love them for them. Baggage and all. 

All in all, I wrote this in hopes that each one of you would know that you are amazing, you are wanted, you are beautiful, you are valuable! This is what God thinks of you, and this is all that matters. It's not about being the "preferred" or looking like the perfect girl but having a genuine heart towards God that truly matters.